ARIES (March 21-April 19): I rarely recommend acquisitive behavior. But my analysis of the astrological omens tells me you now have cosmic authorization to indulge in a sublime version of...

Halloween costume recommendations based on your zodiac

Wield your flair with care, Capricorn

Flex your bulboid corpuscles, Libra

Embrace your dumb side, Capricorn

Request a a miracle, Sagittarius

Hating and Mating Season has arrived

Lubricate your inner life, Gemini

Make preparations for reparations, Scorpio

Show your tool some love, Leo

Freshen up the vibes, Gemini

Uranus is huge, Taurus

Drink, smoke, live long and prosper, Aries

Shut up and listen to God

ARIES (March 21-April 19): One meaning of the word “palette” is a flat board on which painters place a variety of pigments to apply to their canvas. What would be...

CANCER (June 21-July 22): I dreamed that a young elephant appeared on the back deck of my house and stuck its trunk through the open sliding glass door. I got...

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Have you ever been given a Starbucks gift card but then neglected to use it? Many people fail to cash in such freebies. Believe it or...

ARIES (March 21-April 19): I trust that your intuition has been guiding you to slow down and disappear from the frenzied, agitated bustle that everyone seems addicted to. I hope...